My Pefect Day - SAVE THE WHALES!

Nope. I'm not eco-friendly. Not even close. 

There are three plastic Gatorade bottles in the bottom of my garbage bin. 

And it will stay that way. 

So, why save the whales? Isn't that ecofriendly?

Well, I should really specify... 

I don't mean all whales. 

Geez... that just made me sound like the Satan of Orcas. 

Free Willy is probably cursing me right this very second. 

The truth is,

I JUST WANT TO FREE SHAMUS!

(and will do that on my perfect day)

Start of the day: Arrive at Seaworld. 

(The Florida one, because Californians will eat me alive because of my lack of concern for the environment.)

Upon my arrival, I am one step closer to my goal:

Operation Orca Freedom!

O.O.F.!

(O.O.F. is also the sound I will make attempting to lift one of these babies out of the water.)

Second: I buy (or steal, whichever is easiest) one of those wetsuits that the SHAMU trainers wear.
You know, those black and white ones?
That they wear to disguise themselves as orcas?
They aren't fooling anyone.
They just looking like skinny-smiling-Orca-Snacks.
(However, I need one to look legit)

I'd shimmy into that Shamu costume and make my way to the grandstand.
Then, I would follow the trainers to the Secret-SHAMU-Station where they prepare for shows.
O.O.F is near!
As soon as the Shamus entered the large tank, I would too!
(But they'd know I'm not a foe - because like Dory, I can speak whale)

To the suprise of the audience, a helicopter holding a giant net arrives overhead!
I am behind this plot so I spring out of the tank:
"MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!"
As I cackle, the net scoops up all the SHAMUS and takes them to the ocean!
Operation Orca Freedom is complete!

"ASK NOT WHAT SHAMU CAN DO YOU FOR YOU,
BUT WHAT YOU CAN DO FOR SHAMU"